"Cry it Out"?? Wht Th?

SOOO much advice out there for getting your baby to sleep... 
To fall asleep
To sleep through the night
To fall back to sleep by themselves after waking

SO, what I want is the text on continually... RE-training... 2 children who share a room - to sleep like normal people! 
Myla was really the hardest. She fought sleep right out of the womb. No messing around, she probably slept like an infant would be expected to sleep for about 3 days. Then, just like that, it was over (and my sanity, my own sleep, my memory power, my energy - was all zapped right along with it. POOF.) 
Finally, Myla was old enough for me to feel comfortable allowing her to "cry it out." I could tell when it went from "I'm truly in need", to "now I'm just doing anything to get you back in here so I don't have to go to sleep yet." Okay. So, we lay her down awake, and she cries screams for extended periods of time... Those time-lapses eventually do draw down to silence before bed. Hooray! 
Addie was always a sleeper. We actually had no problems with her at all.... UNTIL she started teething. UGH. Here we go again. Our sleeper is now clingy, drooly, whiny, over-tired, and in pain. Lovely. I guess I would have trouble sleeping too. Even with baby pain-relief administered, she just wasn't prepared for solemn slumber without multiple hugs, cuddles, drinks of juice, games of 'please  WHAAAAAA - pick up what I dropped threw"... 
So of course, one day, we finally moved beyond this... and lived happily ever after. HA! Soon thereafter, it's time for Myla to be placed into her "big girl bed". We put it off for as long as we could. It became necessary - in order to avoid having her monkey-see-monkey-doo little sister mimicking her way out of her crib by following Myla's lead when she learned to traverse the rails on her own crib, just across the room. 
Wouldn't you know it - another bout of teething had to coincide with this. SERIOUSLY!
So this is all good and fine, right? We've already determined how to deal with the teething issue... (meds, anyone? And, of course, wine - for US, that is!) But here's the problem: If we don't respond, no longer coming to her/ them... NOW, Myla in her infinite wisdom, realizes that she can come to US. Over, and over, and over, and over, and over....................
There was a stint... a beautiful, peaceful, glorious stint... We'd sway with them, sing a little tune, lay them down, and have QUIET. Solitude. Adult conversation without interruption. Ah, the little things. 
Now that I'm at my breaking point, Joel seems to better understand the severity of the situation when I say the phrase "STOP CODDLING"!!!!! (Loudly. I did preface with the term "braking point", didn't I?") He's since come around to joining forces to make this thing better. But still.... The eldest child can now come to US! How do we make it stop??? Nanny 9-1-1? Dr. Phil? James C. Dobson (author of The Strong-Willed Child)? The Doctors? Dr. Oz.... Someone? Anyone! No one seems to have a clear answer for me... HELP!
Nothing we put in front of her, nothing we threaten (and follow-through with) taking away (games, toys, videos, candy/ treats, opportunities... you name it, we've tried it.) NOTHING keeps her in her bed (or gets her to listen at all)! Discipline in general doesn't work for her - let alone when it applies to sleep - which she has mastered avoiding by now. Time-out? We have had to literally hold her in place to get her to comply with time-out. Though that usually leads to her willfully remaining in her corner, the time-out itself isn't a deterrent to additional bad behavior and a blatant disregard for our parental commands. Can anyone else taste the irony in this? An over-tired child is more likely to act out in defiance, am I right? Even spanking didn't work! (Though now, just the threat of it keeps the littler one from refraining to listen to us - as was our intended goal!)

My current goal: To finally have this thing figured out - BEFORE the FL trip... The clock is ticking - and I'm open to any comments/ suggestions from my fellow-bloggers! (Feel free to offer advice below, and thanks!) :)

TIPS, Please!
2 QUOTES: "I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school."  ~Author Unknown

"When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen.  When they're finished, I climb out."  ~Erma Bombeck

WHIDFML: Writing about this makes it less stressful. :)
Blogging > Therapy.